Have you been accused of OCD-behaviour in the past when it comes to decorating? Does your other half laugh at your crazy homewares behaviour?
I’m here to tell you that you’re not going mad, the world is! And here are 10 crazy at-home behaviours from my place to yours that prove you’re in good company.
You fluff cushions like Mike Tyson
A good decorator knows that cushions need to be fluffed, plucked, pumped and punched on a daily basis. You also know that failing to karate chop them is a fate worse than death. Also, most cushions are for show. When people come over and lean on them, a small part of you dies.
You’re a serial Tupperware labeller
Of course you own clear storage containers. But you’ve also taken the expected and necessary next step of labelling every single one for your pantry so that there’s no confusion as to what lives where. You also organise your pantry religiously. Because cluttered cupboards give you anxiety.
You could be the spokesperson for Spray n’ Wipe
There’s nothing more exhilarating than spraying down the countertops of a morning. What’s even more joy-inducing is repeating this process numerous times throughout the day. I mean, is there seriously anything more refreshing to the nostrils than the whiff or lemon-scented cleaning products?
Your home looks like a florist
Flowers make a necessary first impression in your entryway. They then make a great second impression on your dining table. And a third great impression on your bench top. You get the idea here. You love a floral impression! You’ll cram one into every room you can. Flowers on top of the loo? Why not!?
You have more than one vacuum cleaner
This is basic decorator OCD behaviour and really separates the men from the boys. Truth is, you need a robot vac for when you’re out of the house, a smaller stick vac to get into those high nooks and crannies, and a hand vac for those pesky everyday spills. Any less than three vacuums is just sad and unfortunate.
You actually love your laundry room
Second to the ecstasy of lemon-scented cleaning products is the smell of freshly washed linen. You cherish your time in the laundry – washing, drying and folding – and wouldn’t exchange this glorious ‘me time’ for anything.
You’ve developed chore lists… for other people
You run a tight ship and expect other members of the crew to keep the house looking just as amazing as you do. It’s normal to hand them chore lists. It’s normal to harass them about it. Never apologise.
You have a stash of ‘rested’ homewares
Well, der. Of course certain homewares are ‘summer’ pieces and others are ‘winter’ buys. It’s absolutely normal to have a cupboard packed with decor you rest for six months and crack out again with the change in season. Anyone who tells you otherwise is clueless.
You’re on a first-name basis with the team at Adairs
There’s nothing better than having those automatic doors pull open as you strut into Adairs and having the staff ask, “So what are we buying this week?”. You know what I’m buying, Julie! Didn’t you see those gold-trim photo frames drop on Instagram? You work here. Get with the program.
You’d rather not have people over because they’ll mess up the place
Sad, but true. Nothing worse than wanting people over at your house because they need to see how amazing it is. But on the flip side, they truly have no appreciation for the work that’s gone into it and they will indeed mess it up. Best they stay outside.